The older I get the more clear basically every facet of our society is to exploit us and fill us with propaganda.
The first thing that comes to mind when I wake up is how much I just hate being surround by this species that seems to want nothing more than to destroy itself.
Everything is a fucking joke and I’m fucking tired of everyone but I have a daughter.
I’m absolutely miserable and disgusted by basically everyone but I don’t have the luxury of being able to quit. I just long for death.
I hope I didn’t come across as, “You need drugs.” I totally get that they don’t work for everyone. The brain is complex enough on its own, let alone what meds do to the rest of your body. I’m lucky that they help me a lot, but it did take a while to find my mix.
You seem to have a big heart and sharp mind for large problems that affect us all. It’s a burden. Maybe you can figure out some ways to make small differences in your own life. - Not like holding a sign at a protest. More like choosing where to spend money, reducing fun spending during the next 4 years (staycation instead of vacation, for example), showing up at city hall or school board meetings and standing up for the defenseless. Maybe finding something small that you can DO will help you feel less hopeless over time.
—Unnecessary Examples Below—
One thing that I’ve been thinking about lately is how absolutely isolated we are in the U.S. about everything: culturally, socially, international news, now supply chains… Like yeah, everything “comes from China,” but we get charged insane prices for the privilege of “buying American” because of assembly processes or whatnot.
Anyway, alone, we can’t do much to affect the massive profit machines, but maybe there’s a way to buy your super soaker railgun direct from a Chinese warehouse. TikTok is buzzing with workarounds for products and tariffs.
Another thing I’ve been sitting with is just acknowledging that my fellow Americans lack basic understanding and empathy. They don’t even understand concepts like object permanence or being kind to your neighbors. And it hurts. Idk why, but it does. Maybe I just feel bad because I told myself a lie, or maybe I’m mourning the loss of a group of people who never existed. In any case, I flicker between sadness and spite. I’m in Texas in a district that voted 73% orange: I can safely assume that anyone I run into hates my guts. So I reflect their energy when it’s appropriate, like in traffic situations or grabbing things rudely in the grocery store. So far, this microscopic outlet has assisted me in finding some small way to process my anger and grief.