Fun fact, his wife’s name was Vagina Screwdriver.

On October 18, 1999, Hammer died in Long Beach from lung cancer at the age of 69

“Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?”

“Not right now.”

“A girl’s gotta have her standards.”

If only Susan in Real Genius had had a Marlboro Man named Dick Hammer.

Slab Bulkhead

Bridge Largemeat

Punt Speedchunk

Butch Deadlift

Hold Bigflank

Splint Chesthair

Penis Jigsaw, at your service