I get this way kind of too. For different reasons, I was born premature, and had to fly in a helicopter to a different hospital. Modern Science saved both my and my mothers life. My mother promptly then abandoned me, only solidifing my childish thoughts that I wasnt meant to live.

We got a lot of religous nuts where I live. I always think, “lol your god wanted me dead, I was supposed to die, …am I even supposed to be here?” So I end up with final destination style thoughts too. Somedays it feels like my exsistance is in violation of some natural order or somthing.

admitedly, your story is more interesting, you faught the law and got to win! Funny how we end up with similar thought patterns though.