To be fair, you do get what you pay for… the features are very nice, but not necessary.

TBH, the cold water never bothered me. Now that I have a heated version it is really nice, but not worth the extra money.

I’m a very hairy guy, so getting really clean down there is challenging sometimes. With the bidet I wiggle a bit to make sure the whole area is clean, and I usually do it a couple of times.

And sometimes I wipe to dry and it’s still dirty… I think it has more to do with my diet than anything else. When that happens I just rinse and repeat, or I jump in the shower. Once I realized how much cleaner I feel after using water instead of just paper, I can’t go back.

For anyone else reading this who doesn’t already have a bidet, don’t spend your money on the really fancy ones. You can get a basic model on Amazon for less than $50 (my first one was only $20), and unless you really want the heated seat, deodorizer, or other features, that’s all you need. The water pressure on the cheap ones was way better than on my fancy electronic one too.

A bidet.

Samson by Regina Spektor has to be up there for me.

https://youtu.be/p62rfWxs6a8?si=8JLpHy7IDCO6v0EB

I’m Bigfoot on the moon, and I’m riding a harpoon, but there is no moon, nor a harpoon, so I’m singing the wrong tune.

Here I go again

I think any of the books Mary Roach would suit you. They are easy to read, yet are brimming with science explained in a fascinating and unintimidating way.

Her book Stiff is prolly my favorite. It explains what happens to the body starting with death, and covers medical, forensic, and funerary subjects (among others). Fascinating.