Similarly, I have an iPhone. It was provided by my employer for work purposes. It’s about as enjoyable as having a small stone in my shoe that can’t be removed. Oh, and the other shoe is half a size too small.

My Pixel is so much easier and makes more sense. I carry both when working and use the iPhone only when absolutely necessary.

Can you please not? Fucking hell.

Did the guy on the couch in the first pic do something to not deserve legs?

Depends on the size of the household, ages and activities of people living there. Plus depending on the product and storage, most expiration dates have some wiggle room.