Jumped off a moving train and immediately ate shit, dislocated my shoulder… The train did not seem like it was going very fast. We were still at the platform, just getting going.
There’s a gif out there of a guy doing the same thing, that someone edited so he explodes when he hits the ground… Just like that but no explosion… Except the explosion of pain of course
Lol… Well there is, but I get most people don’t like understanding things like that. Let alone discussing them… But the prompt was “what’s your most unpopular opinion” so you know… Wtf
Thank you, had no idea this was a thing
I mean… The prompt was “what’s your most unpopular opinion” ffs
But thanks for finding that for me… Had no idea I could even see why they banned me… Although I assumed it was that
I’m banned from hexbear, and also I don’t know what I’m doing
After watching several of his videos, and most of the narcissism ones, I’d say he’s great. I’d certainly recommend his channel to anyone looking for an easy to understand intro to these things. Thanks again for the suggestion
Never heard of it I’m afraid. After a quick skim it seems like he calls out religion for it’s bullshit in a few videos, so I like that. But, I’ll have to actually watch some videos to see what he’s about. Thanks for pointing me towards it.
I’m a mental health clinician.
You asked why people reject people with NPD… I tried to explain it. Your response was even more like what you’d expect from someone with NPD than your post was btw. You could have been curious, I am after all, just an internet stranger; who gives a shit what I think? But you went hard on the defensiveness.
You aren’t born with NPD. It’s a defense mechanism against trauma you went through when you were younger. So I am really truly very sorry you went through whatever you went through.
I’m glad you have a therapist, and I hope they are a good fit for you to really feel comfortable opening up about your childhood, and how that might have affected you.
Being able to recognize that SOMETHING is wrong is not the same as truly comprehending WHAT is wrong. I worded my original statement poorly, sorry about that. But that hurt, when you think that something is wrong with you, is the reason most people with NPD can’t face it, not even to fix it. To fix it a person needs to be able to not just think about it, but really dig into it. A full embrace of and deep dive into that thing you say hurts just to think about. Most people can’t bring themselves to even think about it, which is why they get so defensive if you get anywhere near it, on purpose or not. Good on you for facing it.
And I know there’s no cure, but with a lot of work there are work arounds you can train into your brain. I really do hope we find a cure someday. For all personality disorders. They are truly horrible afflictions.
One of the hardest parts is that it’s a non-stop 24/7 battle you didn’t sign up for and never ends and ALWAYS feels completely unfair (this is why people with NPD NEED professional help with it). NPD might not define you, but in order to beat it you will have to be defined by your fight against it… You’ll need to be “spacefox3 the narcissist who’s not going to let it win today” everyday. And we both know you can do it.
That sounds incorrect. Maybe they could recognize their behaviors if you spelled it out for them and put it in a context that in no way indicated you were trying to get them to admit something about themselves… but they’re unlikely to believe there’s actually something wrong with them that they need to work to fix.
That didn’t happen. And if it did, it wasn’t that bad. And if it was, that’s not a big deal. And if it is, that’s not my fault. And if it was, I didn’t mean it. And if I did, you deserved it.
The Narcissist’s Prayer (by Dayna Craig)
All very true… But we do have to DO the work, and unfortunately NPD builds in defenses against even recognizing the issue, let alone doing the work.
They asked why people are so hateful towards people with NPD… I tried to explain it. People with NPD usually hurt everyone around them, and then SEEMINGLY refuse to recognize the hurt they’ve caused or that they themselves have the problem/are the problem. Which is why people feel so strongly against them.
Experience… And perhaps a little over zealous. I was trying to convey that it’s not the person with NPDs fault, but I think it came across as hopeless.
Here’s a quick grab from a Google search:
Targeting the Defenses That Sustain Narcissism
"Treating narcissism can be complex and multi-faceted. That’s because many of the hallmark behaviors of narcissism are the very ones that create enormous barriers to change.
Creating a therapeutic alliance in the face of defensiveness, denial, and a lack of self-awareness can sometimes feel like a hopeless cause. It can also seem uniquely challenging to execute even the gentlest intervention without activating the client’s defenses."
They asked why people are so hateful towards people with NPD, and I tried to explain it as simply as I could. With experienced, professional help, there’s hope for people with NPD… But the disease itself is resistant to treatment, and almost any lay person trying to help is likely going to burn out fast.
This has simply been my experience. It doesn’t sit quite right with me. I want there to be a fix. I’ve just never seen it work.
Oof… This is a tough one. First, I’ll point out that this post is EXACTLY what I’d expect from a narcissist. Woe is me, zero accountability. Assuming you’ve actually been diagnosed by a psychiatric Dr, they didn’t diagnosed you with NPD on a whim. You were diagnosed with NPD after you did something, or more likely after a lot of times doing harmful things, and finally taking some initiative to figure out what’s wrong with you. Maybe friends or family had to really push you towards getting help. Maybe your just young enough that seeking mental health help is normalized, so you were able to go for it.
“As someone who has NPD I haven’t abused or manipulated anyone ever.” -As someone with NPD you wouldn’t be able to recognize if you had ever done these things. This entire post is pretty manipulative actually.
NPD is a very tragic illness. One of the worst parts imo is that, almost always, one of the symptoms is the person not being able to truly recognize their own disorder. This can be dangerous, and also infuriating. A person’s entire life can fall apart around them, and they are incapable of doing the self reflection necessary to understand why, let alone do the work to fix the problem. People will spend years trying to “save” a loved one, to get that person to recognize that it’s THEM who is the problem and needs to do the work, just to get to the exact same spot a decade later because that person CAN NOT recognize it. Recognizing there is a problem is the first step towards fixing yourself. Since NPD usually precludes the person from being able to recognize the problem in themselves, it becomes impossible for them to save/fix themselves. It’s truly insidious.
All those things you listed would make you a bad person if you didn’t try to correct them. And maybe you actually are. I certainly hope so.
Edit to add: asking someone with NPD to be able to self reflect and do the work to change, is like asking a paraplegic to run a marathon. It might seem to others that the person is REFUSING, when in reality they literally cannot physically do so. However, unlike the paraplegic person, a person with NPD causes harm to everyone around them, and the only thing a healthy person can do is cut toxic people from their lives. It’s not the person with NPDs fault (one of the other great tragedies is that it is almost always a result of shit parents) that they are toxic, but they are toxic none the less, and unable to stop it. I’m sorry you ended up this way, I truly hope you can let yourself be treated.
Imagine it’s 7500bce… Most humans are still hunter gatherers but in a few places people have started banding together to form cities. The world is savage, hard, and dangerous. Life is short and cheap, and just like chimpanzees today don’t feel any moral qualms about murdering rival troop members, humans hadn’t really evolved socially to the point of thinking of all humans as inherently “special” or worthy of life… Some could say we still haven’t all evolved to this point.
In that context what we were left with was a bunch of sociopaths. And no wonder. Most people would be somewhat sociopathic if their siblings died in infancy or were carried off to be slaves or eaten by wolves, their parents were murdered in front of them, their village was slaughtered and burned, etc. So these city people, and soon the surrounding people’s, saw sociopathic behavior as normal and even something to be worshipped. (Again, some of us still do)
Sociopaths don’t hesitate to harm other people to increase their own power and wealth, even when they don’t really need anything more to live comfortably. In a world where might makes right, this was a huge advantage and the most horrible and brutal sociopaths rose to become kings of their city states.
There is some evidence that hunter gatherers groups would occasionally get a sociopath among them, but more often than not that person would be shunned and banished from the family. It was only when cities became a thing that there were tons of people from many families, so even if you’re family kicked you out, you could just find other sociopaths who had been kicked out, and together you could just kill anyone who denied you.
There’s also the fact that as soon as people started settling down and using agriculture to create excess food, the hunter gatherers around them started trying to take that food because hey, free food. So then you need to start defending your food stores, and again sociopaths rise to the top because they are the most ruthless “defenders”.
Those sociopathic traits continued in the ruling class throughout all of human pre history and history. Right down to today where people continue to worship the sociopaths like Musk, Trump, or even Hillary. It’s a childish thought process of “my dad can beat up your dad”, which makes me feel safer, even if sometimes my dad also beats me.
Edit: just to add that the only reason we can even have this conversation is because, for the first time in human history, large swaths of the human population HAVE socially evolved to the point of recognizing innate human value, and thus can also recognize sociopathic behavior
What if we glorify horrible contemporary people because we’re taught to glorify sociopathic behavior through how we’re taught about historical horrible people?
Does your mom or sister have legal custody of you?
So, WW3 won’t happen until the oligarchy says it’s time. Not sure why now would be the time, but I suppose it could be. There’s like a billion people in the world making a dollar a day, a few billion people only making a few dollars a day… That’s a few billion dollars per day the oligarchy almost certainly thinks belongs in their pocket instead. So I could see them continuing to squeeze the world for every last drop of wealth, which I think will cause unrest in a lot of places. Add climate change to that and I think things just get bad everywhere for most people. Obviously the oligarchy will just go to their islands, yachts, bunkers until a few billion are dead and they can pop back out with their private armies ready to “save” the world.
A lot of people think they need us to buy their trinkets, but the entire consumer middle class is only like 100 years old, and I think was only designed to keep us distracted while they plundered the world. Now that a small handful of people own everything, and soon enough robots and AI will replace most human labor, it’s mission accomplished and we can go back to feudalism where they are gods and everyone else is slaves.