No. I depress the keys with telekinesis.

Ideally, not without getting a smack in the teeth.

Bitsy Pookums

I like Calvin & Hobbes

We’d better get a Space Cowboys movie out of this!

And Mr Krabs’ daughter is a whale.

Depressing realisation about life: It ends.

Positive benefits about life: It ends.

Oh suuuure!

Even after unknown persons broke the floodlights? Weird.

Unknown persons have broken the floodlights, right?

I never farted quietly when I was younger, I’m not about to start now!

Man, everything has to be instant these days. What about readopting the leisurely pace of bulletin boards?

Newsvibing?

Hang onto them; RAM is the new Bitcoin!

Traditionally, a condom. But only for a decade or so. Just long enough for it to mark an eternal shape of dismal circumstance.