but I got rid of television in 2021 and started torrenting content.

Silly me, I meant to type 2001. Obviously, there was a strong streaming market in 2021 to let me pay for content.

Agreed. Go to Patreon and let me pay for an ad-free stream. I’m a member of fourteen different Patreon projects. Used to be more, but a couple of podcasts drifted from where they were when I signed up and I lost interest.

I buy software licenses too. And I buy my music. I rent movies on streaming services and sometimes buy for things I know will have a high replay value.

I feel no shame blocking ads. They’re invasive and annoying. People have been conditioned to accept them, but I got rid of television in 2021 and started torrenting content. Now that there’s good infrastructure to pay for my media (ad free) and I can afford it, I choose to support those who make what I enjoy. Fuck ads. If I can’t block them, I’ll just go elsewhere.

I used to steal a lot when I was a teen, mostly for the thrill. We grow and we mature and we change. It sounds like you’re becoming a better person and also watching out for your future. That’s commendable.

I agree with another user who suggested therapy. I’ve been in therapy most of my life (with some gaps) starting when I was the teen who was constantly getting arrested and causing trouble. It switched from a thing I was forced to do and became a thing that I do to help realize my goals in adulthood. Example: figured out why I was still angry about a thing from years ago and successfully put it behind me in a recent session.

Maybe you don’t need to speak to someone. That’s fine, too. Your brain is still developing. If you succeed in not stealing any more and you pay back your brother perhaps it’s all fine. But again, I think there’s value in understanding the compulsion if you still feel it but aren’t acting on it.

You’re not a shitty person. If you go back to stealing, you’ll be something of a shitty person. But if it’s a phase you’ve outgrown and you try to make it right, that’s called being young and stupid. We all go through it to some degree in our own ways. Focus on your future and on being a good person each day. It’s fine.

In the case of my mother, I instituted a no-politics rule in 2020. However, as of last week, I’m sending her accusatory emails about the various articles of his fucked up actions. I’ve decided that she is partially a bad person for having full info about who and what he is and chose not to know. I’m very angry and she’s going to keep hearing about it. The relationship might be over.

I know that doesn’t help your situation. I just needed to vent. As noted, I’m very angry. With her in particular. For choosing this again.

Hype bubble. Has potential, but nothing like what is promised.

Yes, so what?

https://stratechery.com/2025/deepseek-faq/

Who the fuck cares? They’re all doing this.

Same age, buying a Freddy glove for Halloween, asked my dad if we could rent it and he said yes. I was scared when the boyfriend pranked them in the backyard, but I thought the scene where she got cut to shreds and floated was awesome. I wanted to rewind and see it again and this time Dad said no. Wisely.

Kagi seems to be really good, according to John Gruber. I don’t do enough web searches to need an alternative or justify paying for a subscription, so it’s all third-hand for me.

I had a drive fail two days after purchase. I had just copied all my data to it and erased my primary drive to copy everything back and clean it up. I spent (rather, my father spent (I was barely an adult and he helped me out)) ~$3000 for data recovery) to get everything back. Despite recovery, the experience caused me depression at how fragile my digital life was.

Storage is comparatively cheap compared to at that time. I was depressed because I was young and not making much money and storage was expensive. I could hardly afford to pay to protect my data. It’s much easier to do so now.

Have multiple backups. Have one be offsite in case of natural disaster. I mailed an external drive of all the music I’d made on my computer to a family member in another state. Cover your ass.

If you can afford to eat out on occasion, you can save enough to protect your data. Backblaze is currently $9 / month. It’s stupid-cheap. An external disk and some open source backup software is stupid-cheap. Run both and you have your data in three places: source, external, cloud.

I won on a radio call-in show called “name that tune,” three times. They took two callers. First one gets one second of music and time to answer. If they fail, the second gets ten seconds of music and time to answer.

I was in the one-second position all three times. I was sort of amazed that I kept winning. The prize was a CD in each game. That’s how I got into Stabbing Westward, as I wouldn’t have bought Whither, Blister, Burn and Peel myself, but it was a prize.

Wait a minute, are you Julian? Cackle cackle.

I spent ages setting the channels on a car radio

Ha. Same.

I wish you luck. Wish I had advice but this was the best I can do.

I’ve added them to my torrent server. I’ll let the seed continuously with no cap. I have gigabit fiber.

Thanks for taking the initiative.

Welcome in from the cold. We have cocoa and blankets.

While I don’t have experience in this area, I trust that someone will be able to give you some advice.

Citations Needed: a podcast about media. Basically goes into how media covers some events and topics from a leftist perspective.

Interesting. I’ll check this out.

• Better Offline: Ed Zitron tearing apart how shitty the tech industry has become
• QAA Podcast: studies conspiratorial thinking (originally devoted to watching Qanon lunatics), typically hilarious
• Accidental Tech Podcast: three third-party Apple developers talking about tech, primarily in the Apple ecosystem
• Chapo Traphouse: Leftist politics, typically pretty funny
• Noble Blood: history podcast retelling stories about members of nobility in short form
• Fall of Civilizations Podcast: history podcast that dives deep into civs like Carthage and the Assyrians, etc
• TrueAnon: Leftist politics, deep dives on topics
• Last Podcast on the Left (name is a horror film reference): true crime with anecdotes, lots of diversions that might not be for everyone
• Alphabet Boys: each season deep dives a taboo action by gov agencies (FBI, ATF, etc)
• Song Exploder: deep dives on the writing and recording of songs with the musicians behind them
• What Went Wrong: deep dives on movie productions
• Behind the Bastards: deep dives on terrible people throughout history, lots of diversions that might not be for everyone
• Grumpy Old Geeks: tech and nerd news (including sci-fi media) from two cynical guys who have been in the biz for years, typically funny

I am considering whether my mother and I will have a relationship going forward. It was already strained by the last orange term. I instituted a no-politics rule to save our relationship.

She knows I’ve been planning to move to NZ because he won again. I mentioned that I’m feeling enormous conflict about leaving my partner (can’t follow due to refugee status and lack of citizenship) and she told me she’s optimistic about the future and we live in the “greatest country on earth.” This was on inauguration day and I fucking lost it.

Emails that I have sent to her since:

Subj: Trump orders US withdrawal from the World Health Organization - Ars Technica

You shouldn’t vote and your offspring have to live with the consequences of your vote.

https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2025/01/trump-orders-us-withdrawal-from-the-world-health-organization/

Subj: He pardoned the Jan 6 rioters

You contributed to violent criminals (some convicted of seditious conspiracy) walking free. You did this.

Subj: You voted to humiliate my friends

https://www.notus.org/whitehouse/trump-gender-sex-order-passports

Subj: Trump Rescinds Biden Order Aimed at Lowering Prescription Drug Prices

You cause harm to innocent people with your vote.

https://www.commondreams.org/news/trump-drug-prices

Honestly, I’ve concluded that she’s a bad person for voting for him. I still love her. She raised me and protected me from an abusive father (as best she could). But this fucking sucks and she sucks for helping to make it happen. There’s a real possibility that I will end my relationship with her because of this. And that sucks, but there has to be a line.

I would only not attend if it’s a financial burden. Don’t try to send a message. It won’t be heard. Simply assess if it is no longer worth your time and effort and let him know you aren’t interested in upending your life on his behalf.

If you’ve got the money and it isn’t a big deal to take a nice vacation, still attend the wedding. After the honeymoon, let him know you’re done with his ass.

Aside: I’m presently evaluating whether my mother and I will maintain a relationship. I’m extremely angry with her for voting this way yet again and I have concluded (based on the day-one exec orders) that she is partially a bad person because of her politics. I still love her, but I’ve had enough. If you’re going to hurt the world with your vote, I may not continue having you in my life.

Apologies, I misunderstood.