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Cake day: June 19th, 2023

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  • Why will they arrest you? Because that’s what cops are for: enforcing the laws of the government.

    Why is operating a moving vehicle drunk against the law, even when it’s slow? Because even a skateboard can be dangerous to others when not operated with care. Since being drunk reduces your ability to operate anything with care, the more dangerous the moving vehicle, the more justification there is to regulate it under dwi/dui/owi type laws.

    A riding mower is already an inherently dangerous machine, when operated sober and in the intended manner. Hundreds of pounds (and even more kilos) of weight, moving at a reasonable speed in your own yard can fuck shit up. Take it on the road where it isn’t supposed to be, get drunk, and now you’ve got the ability to kill someone else.

    So, while cops poking their nose into shit and being tools of the state ain’t cool, if you’re out drunk and doing anything but walking, somebody should intervene. I don’t necessarily think that the default for something like a lawn mower should be a criminal offense on par with operating a car or motorcycle, but it definitely merits the person being secured away from said mower and cited with some kind of societal measures to reduce the chances of it happening again.

    In other words, if you can’t act like a responsible adult, you get put in time out.



  • The only time ai is useful for writing is if you are the only one to read it. As a form of self entertainment, it’s whatever. But as a tool to create? Worse than useless. It isn’t even a good copy editor at this point; none of the models out there are good enough at that to be any better than doing it yourself.

    If you really want to write, accept that you are going to suck. Everyone sucks at writing. Ideas? We can be great at that with no effort.

    But writing is a craft. You don’t just grab a brush, some paint, and expect to be Renoir a week later. You don’t grab a hammer and saw and expect to have a nice piece of furniture a week later.

    But people seem to think that writing is going to be different. Yeah, there’s talent involved; inborn ability to process language in a useful way is a big asset. Having a genuinely creative mind where ideas just pop up all the time is a huge asset.

    But they ain’t shit without both practice and criticism. See, unlike more visual crafts, you can’t have any success at self critique. Not that you should rely on that with painting or whatever either, but at least you can look and see if the end results match your vision in a glance. So to get better at the craft of writing, you need readers, and you have to be willing to listen to what they say, even if it turns out they’re wrong.

    Writing, real writing, is not learnt in a week, a month, a year. Even with all the natural talent possible, all the workshops and creative writing classes out there, your first finished story is going to suck at least a little. The craft of writing takes no less time to master than what it would take to become a black belt at a serious martial arts school. Years at a bare minimum.

    My advice? Go over to !writingprompts@literatue.cafe

    Every day, every single day, go back and respond to one prompt. Just one. And start as far back as it goes. If whoever posted responds, great. If not, spend the first week or so reviewing what you wrote and thinking about how to make it better.

    If you respond to each and every prompt there, and by the end, you aren’t able to be coherent at all, give up. But i suspect you’ll reach coherency fairly fast as you go back and fix what you fucked up.

    I’d also advise that you don’t edit your responses. Rewrite each one as a fresh comment, so you can track what you’re doing, and anyone interested can give feedback as you adjust.

    Now, nor every prompt is going to spark an idea for you. That’s what craft is for. That’s how you learn craft: writing shit despite not being inspired. Wrangling words into order and sense is a skill. No better way to do that than writing shit that’s boring as hell.



  • In general, I think people run into confusing exactly what is and isn’t the kind of stupid that’s right for this place.

    Questions can be perfectly valid, but not really something you couldn’t ask anyone, any time, and get a deciding decent answer, so those get down voted a good bit.

    Then you run into posts that are really more shittyasklemmy territory. They’re essentially jokes that neither deserve nor can be answered in a useful way.

    There’s also the ones that are word salad that get down voted because nobody knows what the fuck is being asked.

    Your most recent one fell afoul of not really being a question as much as it was a rant in question form. Which never goes over well here (I always down vote those, personally). Still answered in that case, but it really wasn’t in the spirit of the C/, so I felt it worth the vote down.

    You had previous questions that were great, btw. It was just that one that rang funky.

    I can’t speak for everyone, obviously, but thats my take on the trends of heavily down voted posts.

    The ones that are genuine questions that wouldn’t be easy to ask and get answered irl or in most online spaces, those are the ones that tend to get up votes and plenty of responses



  • I’m going to assume you want at least one direct, serious answer.

    If you really want to “speak dada”, you’ve got to embrace both absurdity as well as anti-establishment thinking. Because that’s the root of dada. The movement started as a rejection of the norms of the era, and spread into art, literature, and other forms of expression after that.

    I tend to look at it as something that has lost its relevance due to having become part of western culture so effectively that the expression of dadaism is almost as bourgeois as the things it originally stood against. Hell, meme culture is a perfect example of that, in its earliest forms.

    Anyway, that’s the key: absurdity and upending norms.


  • I’m gonna suggest Owl House as a must see pick. The entire run is just so good, and hits all the right buttons for a cross generation watching. I watched it with my kid, originally reluctantly, and eventually came to love it myself.

    I’d also suggest Monster High. While it leans a little bland in terms of messaging and characters, it makes up for it by being visually fun and easy to watch in random sessions since there’s very little mandatory order to watch things in. Depending on how you view such things though, there’s the goodbad fact of there being dolls and toys linked to it.

    But both have a reliable foundation of accepting people as they are, being kind, and treating others well. There’s good conflict resolution moments, good affirmations on finding one’s authentic self, etc. I’d err on the side of Owl House being the better of the two, but monster high sometimes hits a little better for some kids





  • My understanding, and it is completely casual, layman level understanding, is that patriarchy started around the birth of property and inheritance.

    There’s plenty of evidence (that someone already linked to a layman’s level article) showing that our earliest societies didn’t have gendered hierarchy at all, and that it wasn’t all patriarchal when it started.

    But for the most part, the control of women was only a useful thing once the need to have control over inheritance became important. If you don’t have land or wealth to pass on, then there’s really no point to one sex/gender being dominant to another. There isn’t a point to it in that regard in my opinion, since I don’t view biological offspring to be more worthy of inheritance than otherwise, but some people did care, especially when leadership came with a great deal of ownership as well.

    Afaik, that’s when patriarchy became something that was etched into laws and religion. When the leadership, and thus ownership, was passed down, and the passing went from father to son. When that’s in place, controlling reproduction becomes paramount, and to control reproduction, you have to control women since while you couldn’t prove who someone’s father was way back then, it was hella hard to fake who gave birth.



  • First and foremost, dog training is language training.

    You aren’t really teaching them to do things, you’re teaching them to understand the sounds and movements you make when you want them to do things.

    This means that regardless of anything else, you have to be consistent in both the execution of and understanding of what language you’re using.

    Example: you say sit when training with a calm voice and a little lilt at the end. But in daily life, you say sit sharply and without the hand gesture you’d been using during lessons. When that’s the case, you can’t blame the dog for not understanding automatically that you want them to do the thing you used different words for.

    Animals don’t process language the same way we do, but we can still run into problems understanding what someone else wants us to do when they say it in an unusual way. Why would a dog magically understand the difference between “sit, puppy”, “puppy, sit”, and/or “dammit, why won’t you sit?!”

    Consistency is how we learn languages as humans, and we have sections of our brain dedicated to language that are very developed compared to even our closest relatives in the animal kingdom.

    The flip side of that is that you have to train yourself at the same time as the dog. You have to train yourself in the commands you want them to connect with a behavior. Make sure you learn how you’re saying things, and any secondary or tertiary signals are included.

    Example: if you want the dog to eventually know that the word sit, a hand gesture, and a tone of voice mean you want them to sit, you have to consistently use those commands. Eventually, even the dumbest dog will figure out that any of those commands mean you want their butt on the floor, but if you aren’t consistent with them, it’ll take longer.

    Remember, that dog hears your words and tone, sees your movements and posture, and reads your facial expressions. *All" of those are part of the command you’re teaching them to respond to with a specific behavior.

    That’s why a lot of trainers have a process of introducing those things in a controlled and specific way.

    And, if you deviate from the command you actually taught (like screaming word sit while making angry face, bent over and shaking a finger at them instead of the usual), don’t be mad at them for not responding to this totally new and different signal grouping with a behavior you taught them with a different combination of signals.


  • You know the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?

    !can’t pay fifty for a garbanzo to bean on my face!<

    Jokes aside, yes to both, though the jelly bean would be flavor specific like any oddity would.

    People do add sweet things to chill, and it works rather well. This includes things that are within your typical jellybean flavor range. Pretty much any jelly would be fine in small amounts (and pepper jelly really is one of those “secret” ingredients that folks love to pretend isn’t obvious). When that’s the case, a standard jellybean is going to be okay in similarly small amounts. I’m dubious that licorice ones would work, but I have been exposed to chili with anise before, and it wasn’t horrible.

    I definitely wouldn’t want bubblegum flavored jellybeans in my chili, but the rest? Eh, I’d be down to try them.


  • As everyone has essentially said, ain’t no such thing as bad beans for a chili. And that goes for stuff you might not think of as being good in chill. But I’ve cobbled together chili out of some seriously depleted pantries over the years, and I swear that any legume I’ve run across has worked, to some degree or another. Only question wound be the best prep for a given bean.

    No bullshit, ive done it with limas, lentils, and peas at various points in time, and they all worked fine. Different, yes, but still quite nice



  • Not improv like it used to be?

    Dude, it’s sketch comedy. It’s always been scripted, it’s just that it’s okay to go off script as needed. It’s been that way since the beginning.

    I mean, not every cast member is actually good for sure, and that’s been true since the beginning too. But that’s totally different from what you’re saying.

    I’m with you that weekend update has been the most reliable part of the show since Che and Jost have been the chairs though. Imo, the best or second best WE hosts in the entire run (depending on exactly which era of the various WE teams you look at, but I’d say Che and Jost have been the most consistent).

    And, while I think the term cringe has been so over used that it’s time to bury it, SNL has largely been about being cringe the entire time. To do live sketch comedy, you have to embrace being stupid and awkward. Not every bit is going to hit, so you gotta commit to all of them and that means a ton of cringe is inherent to the process. I mean, fuck, the Shannon/O’Terri/Ferrell era was intentionally cringe on purpose so often it kinda defines that era.


  • Ehhhh, I tend to think the distances are less important than the fact of the infrastructure being prohibitive to set up.

    Trains like that can’t just be dropped onto the existing rail network. I mean, even if the rails p tracks we have would allow them to operate at speed, it would be a nightmare getting them to mesh with existing rail traffic. You’d lose the high speed factor, defeating the purpose.

    So, even in individual states, where the distances are closer to what you’d see in japan, it’s not a net practical solution without some serious rejiggering.

    You could likely get some lines done anyway, like from D.C. to a few major cities on the east coast. But would there really be a benefit? Would it reduce highway traffic significantly? Would it be safer and more efficient than existing passenger rail? I genuinely have no idea, but there would be a need for that kind of thing to make it worth building out. If it’s just shifting a small fraction of city-to-city commute, I don’t know that or would be worth the massive project it would take