tae glas [siad/iad]

i hope it didn’t come across as harsh! really both problems 1 & 2 that you’ve outlined are the same things that everyone is dealing with. a lot of systems of oppression like patriarchy, european colonialism, capitalism, ableism, etc push people into isolation by design, & then tell people to heal from that in isolation, rather than in community.

(i suspect it’s designed that way to make people feel that these are individual problems & not collective problems, because if we realise that we’re all suffering from the same systems of oppression, we might do something to end those systems!)

we humans are a social species, and we’ve lived & learned & healed in community with one another for hundreds of thousands of years. just being open & communicating with the friends you already have about those issues is a great first step, then seeking out hobby groups etc is a way that you might expand your social circle beyond other men.

for the dating side of things, dating apps can be great, because boundaries are lot clearer there (over what is a date, what people are looking for etc) & that way, you can avoid the potential messiness of dating within your friend group.

tl;dr: i don’t think the formality of classes/training would be needed for this, but talking to your friends about this & going out of your way to make friends with mixed company would help a lot. (also, gathering with your friends, new & old, to dismantle the systems of oppression that are causing all these problems will solve things for future generations too 😎)

in my opinion, no. an artist’s worldview informs their art, so things like racism/misogyny/ableism etc etc seep into the works they create. consuming media like that uncritically can be harmful by reinforcing biases, conscious or unconscious.

there’s also the more direct harm that can be done by financially supporting certain artists. jk rowling, for example, is funnelling any wealth she gets from the harry potter franchise into funding anti-trans organisations.

in my experience, people who want to separate art from the artist just want to continue uncritically consuming everything, without feeling guilt over the harm they could be doing by “voting with their dollar”.

If men are facing a loneliness epidemic, they could learn to be friends with one another, enjoy one anothers’ company, and open up to one another about being lonely etc, instead of expecting women to train them.

I cant train men on how women want to be treated, and I wouldnt even want to tell men how women should be treated seeing as im not a woman.

Women want to be treated as equals to men, to be paid the same as men are, to be promoted in jobs as often as men are, and to be represented in government and media as much as men are. This is absolutely something that men can and should tell other men about.

if you articulate this to them, you’ll already be doing better than most parents & partners.

communication is super important to avoid kids getting the wrong message or feeling rejected etc. it’s hard to tell how kids might internalise things, so just being honest about what’s going on in your life (in a simplified way since 4 is so young) & admitting that you’re not proud of your reaction goes a long long way to building a healthy relationship with your kids.

i hope you can access healthcare to get your heart problem seen to, as well, that sounds super worrying. stay safe!

i can use the searchbar on jellyfin & if it’s not already there, i can request it using jellyseer within that same search bar, so it’s possible to integrate the two somehow.

i’m afraid i’m not sure of the specifics though, i’m only using a friend’s jellyfin 🫣